Awkward: A Texan Goes to Lacrosse Camp
I thought I was so cool!
I was a sophomore playing on the varsity lacrosse team at my high school.
In my small pond I had started to elevate my level of play and was beginning to be recognized.
It felt like a big deal.
I had worked very hard on my skills. I spent countless hours throwing a solid rubber lacrosse ball against the wall.
It was my friend.
It never got mad, never missed a pass, and never had to go inside for dinner.
It helped me to a whopping 1 goal that first year, but man did I feel capable.
I decided to take my talents (a la Lebron James) from Dallas, Texas to the lacrosse hotbeds of New England the following summer.
I was ready.
I had worked pool construction early in the summer to help pay for the travel and camp tuition.
I earned it, I wanted to go.
The camp was called New England Top 225. It was an “elite” camp for serious lacrosse players. That’s me!
The title of the camp suggests that this was an invitation-only affair, and that some invisible committee selected the best 225 players and brought them together for a jamboree of sport.
Hardly. We just paid the tuition and showed up.
Have you ever arrived at any event and immediately felt out of place? Have you ever missed the memo that detailed the dress code? Me too!
Remember way back at the start of this article, I thought I was very cool.
I was wrong. I failed the eyeball test.
We were walking from the dorms to the fields to begin preparing for the first field session.
As I looked around, nobody else was wearing soccer cleats. I failed to see anyone that had the same helmet, arm pads, or gloves as me.
My lacrosse stick was the only stick at camp that was purple.
I had also missed the memo that lacrosse players in the New England area wear baggy mesh shorts - I was wearing some weird “wind” shorts.
I didn’t look like a lacrosse player.
I looked like an alien from another planet, and I knew it.
Never phased, I put that chip on my shoulder and told myself, “Let’s start playing and that’ll show ‘em.”
As the first few passing and catching drills started I was doing…okay, right? I was catching and throwing, but it was labored.
It wasn’t as carefree and easy as the others made it look.
Welcome to Humbleville, USA.
I was in awe.
I had never seen such grace and style. These well versed, entrenched local lacrosse players were so good.
They made the game look so easy. They had it. Their game had swagger. Their movements were crisp and sharp.
I was struggling.
My game didn’t look like that. I had the athletic ability to run and compete physically, but my skills were so raw.
I was relegated to “trying hard.” I was “that” guy. I didn’t stand out.
As the camp drew to a close, I had improved, it was inevitable.
The impact of that first camp, beyond developing my lacrosse skills, changed the course of my life.
I started practicing - a lot!
Just one year later I was attending an actual invitational camp. I had finished a full field scrimmage and was gathering my things to head back to my room.
Coach John Tillman (Offensive Coordinator at the U.S. Naval Academy) made his way over and complimented my abilities and attitude.
He asked if I would be interested in coming to the Naval Academy to play lacrosse for the Midshipmen.
I was flattered - quite frankly I was on a cloud.
I was being noticed and validated by a respected member of my community. That was a huge moment.
I had traveled a significant distance and learned more than lacrosse along the way.
1 / The discomfort
It stings so badly, especially at the onset.
It is enough to stop you in your tracks and ask the question, “what am I doing here?”
For me, finding just enough courage to try, to observe the new environment around me, kept me from running for the early flight home.
Not an absolute, but here is something I think is true: everyone in these situations is uncomfortable!
I don’t have the right bag. I don’t have the “it” phone. I don’t have the same clothes. My stuff doesn’t have my initials on it.
This list is exhaustive.
We need to give ourselves a break, nobody has it all, and everyone feels uncomfortable in a new environment.
We think that everyone is peering into our souls, our stuff, and assigning a social value.
In reality we are all just squirming and fiddling in our own skin.
It’s okay.
Give a new start a chance, hang in there - it takes courage.
Like most stings, with a little care it goes away and turns into a great story.
2 / The experience
Making it beyond those very uncomfortable first steps of not fitting in were formative, I can say that the growth I made over a short period of time changed the trajectory of my young life.
I had to swallow a big piece of humility and get laced up for the next challenge.
There are so many cliches that could apply here…
It’s not where you start, it’s where you end up.
It’s about the journey, not the result.
You can do anything you put your mind to.
I never once thought of those things. I was a teenager. I just wanted to be a great athlete and lacrosse player.
What I didn’t realize is that I was learning to deal with adversity.
I was learning to find a healthy way to challenge myself and make a path - my own path.
Just because I wasn’t on the same trajectory as those that I wanted to emulate didn’t mean I was sunk.
Ultimately, I think it enabled me to embrace the road less traveled - and I am thankful for that.
3 / The opportunity
My early formative camp experiences opened a sliding door. I am thankful to have walked through it.
I was able to attend the United States Naval Academy, play lacrosse for a nationally competitive program, and serve in the United States Navy as a combat naval aviator and squadron commander for more than 20 years.
I have served alongside some of the best human beings ever.
I have something, an identity, that I am so proud of (even though I am “has been” retiree now).
It all traces back to being an awkward outsider at lacrosse camp.
Take a deep breath and show up for yourself!
This is why we’re prioritizing providing summer camp opportunities for military kids.
These camps can be exclusive, not just because of the requirements, but because of the financial commitment required.
It can be a barrier to entry that we want to remove for any active duty military kid who might desire a similar experience - be it athletic or academic.
We want to see military kids out there.
We want to open as many doors as we can for these deserving young people to go storming through.
We are currently partnering with the Naval Academy STEM program to identify stand out active duty military kids with an interest in STEM.
We are looking to provide full scholarships and travel benefits for summer sessions in 2023.
